ATTENTION: DOG IN TRAINING!!
1. Please ring doorbell or text/call to ascertain if dog is on-leash or being forcibly restrained BEFORE ENTERING!!
2. DO NOT open door or screen door unless one of us is there and the dog is secured.
3. If we are not home, enter through garage. Be prepared to chase dog in case teenagers left the inner door open.
4. If dog escapes because you ignored rules #1, 2 and 3, you are responsible to catch said dog and return her safely to us. Enjoy your five-mile sprint and obstacle course.
5. If dog escapes and you are running, know that no one will help you catch her because she looks like a fox in pursuit of prey. Be prepared for the possibility of buckshot or gunfire aimed at you or “fox” in flight.
6. If, by some miracle, you gain entry to our home without any of the aforementioned mishaps, please do not respond to our darling Shiba Inu, who will be jumping up on you by way of greeting. Please ignore dog until she is calm or until one of us gives you leave to worship her highness properly.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION